Saturday, April 2, 2011

BOUNDARIES

"armadillo...
armor all my boundaries,
teach me my shields,
reflect all the hurt,
so i will not yield.

armadillo wears its armor on its back, its medicine a part of its body. its boundaries of safety are a part of its total being. armadillo can roll into a ball and never be penetrated by enemies.

what a gift it is to set your boundaries so that harmful words or intentions just roll off. your lesson is in setting up what you are willing to experience. if you do not wish to experience feeling invaded, just call on armadillo medicine.

a clue to how to proceed is to make a circle on a piece of paper and see it as a medicine shield. in the body of the shield, write all that you desiring to have, do, or experience. include all things that give you joy. this sets up boundaries that allow only these chosen experiences to be a part of your life. these boundaries become a shield that wards off the things which are undesirable to you. the shield reflects what you are and what your will is to others on an unconscious level. outside of the shield you may put what you are willing to experience by invitation only, for example, a visit from a long lost relative, or criticism from friends, or people needing handouts.

if armadillo has waddled into the cards you chose, it is time to define your space. you may have been too willing to let your home become a bus station. you may find that you cannot say no even when you know that you will have to cancel plans to be obliging. this routine can get old in a hurry!

it may be time to ask yourself the following questions:
1 - am i honoring the time i need for my personal enjoyment?
2 - do others treat me like a doormat?
3 - why do i always get upset when i'm taken for granted?
4 - is there a reason for my being a "yes" person?

all of the answers to these questions relate to setting up boundaries: what you will and won't do; what makes you feel uncomfortable and what is comforting to you. how you react in any circumstance has to do with your ability to be objective. you cannot be objective if you cannot tell where the other person's personality stops and where yours begins. if you have no boundaries, you are like a sponge. it will seem as if all the feelings in a room full of people must be yours. ask yourself if you are really feeling depressed, or if this feeling actually belongs to the person you are talking to. then allow armadillo's armor to slice in-between, giving you back your sense of self."

---

you will respect me.
you will respect me as a fellow human.
you will respect me as a woman.
you will respect me as a musician.
you will respect my instrument.
you will respect my body.
you will respect how i choose to take care of myself in order to do my job - whether or not it is your way.

you will respect me.
you will respect me.
YOU WILL RESPECT ME.

and i will uphold my end of this sacred agreement night after night.

i am so incredibly honored to do this work. thank you for teaching me. thank you for respecting me. thank you for listening - in the deepest sense. thank you, thank you, thank you.

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